BDSM And Humiliation

Many people in the vanilla world think BDSM is about abuse and Humiliation , when in fact , a vanilla married female probably suffers far more humiliation , than the average D’s couple. A D’s couple relationship is based more on trust and respect , far more caring.

In the average vanilla relationship , there is about a half hour of communication on a weekly basis , this includes pass the salt. This is probably the major cause of infidelity and divorces today in the vanilla world.

Most vanilla are afraid to bring up kinks they want to try with their wife and the same with the women because , of rejection or each will think something is wrong with the other, I am speaking from experience here.

Why because they do not have this open communication a D’s couple has.  A D’s couple has that open communication , they know that no topic is taboo. Nothing is off limits. No fear of being judged.

Why do married men stray outside of the marriage , because it is something they are not getting at home , their wife refuses to give head , or anal is off limits , but hey the man new this before he got married , he knew she didn’t suck dick or take it up the ass, so Suck it up.Deal with it.

I have a very good friend who is married and vanilla , who pays a hooker 20 bucks a week to get his dick sucked because his wife wont , that is really a shame 1200 dollars a year. That is a lot of steak for grilling, but he knew when he said I DO she did not go down south , nor open the back door. The odds in him bringing something home are very high and one day it will happen.

Humiliation places a part in both worlds , mostly because most vanilla men are not in control they are controlling , the need to walk around with there chest out , I am man hear me roar. Talking down to her because he has to feel in charge, both yelling at each other , and yes sometimes even physical . Once a relationship becomes physical it only gets worse , What really gets me is a man will beat his wife on Monday, then he apologizes , and that night with her black eye and swollen lip he now wants the pussy because it is his right. Are you serious? I am sure that every female who reads this has either experienced this or knows someone who is going through this..

Now on the other side their are vanilla women who crave abuse be it verbal or physical for what ever reason , this is still not acceptable. Most vanilla men are very controlling , probably stems from a security problem, King of there house, having the need to put there woman in place.  The macho thing around there friends.

In the Bdsm world some Dominants or Domme’s will use some humiliation in there relationship but it is not about abuse. It is about putting there submissive in that state of mind. Now what is the difference here. This was an agreement prior to entering the relationship , back to each others needs. Some of the slave positions I posted on here are just for that , to put them in that state of mind, it is not about abuse or being controlling.

Now if a Dominant happens to run across a submissive who has issues with humiliation , or has experienced abuse in the past , be it mental , physical , or verbal . A good dominant would take a different avenue, a different approach. After all we are here for support , to help, to guide, to keep safe.

A dominant male in my eyes are much more protective than a vanilla male. A dominant male wants his to be all they can be , very supportive. So the humiliation factor is on a different playing field.

A D’s relationship is not about abuse, very seldom will you see a dominant lose his temper to his submissive, or yell , call names out of anger. A dominant male is in far more control than a vanilla. If you are living with your master and you are experiencing any of the abuse I would re-think your relationship.

A master should never at anytime raise his voice to you out of anger , or just sit around and bark orders because he can , or push your limits without a care. This is abuse.

I myself set aside about an hour a day to converse in general conversation, I want to know what their thinking, whats on there mind , are there any issues they would like to bring up. At dinner I turn the cell phone off. That is our time.

Okay I am done rambling ….

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Vile

3 Responses to “BDSM And Humiliation”

  1. *big smile* This blog made my monday blues disappear. Keep blogging, Schlecht.

  2. I shall , I hope you have a good week…

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