Archive for the Cherish Category

An Email From A Slave

Posted in 24/7, abuse, Acceptance, Advice, anal sex, Argue, Arianna, Ass, ass fucking, bdsm, BDSM Communitys, Bdsm events, BDSM Safety, blow job, Cherish, codependent, Collar, collaring ceremony, communication, Consensual, Consistency, control, Discipline, events, Friends, Friendship, Giving Head, Indebted, Manipulation, Marriage ceremony, MAST, Master, munchs, No Rights, oral, oral sex, owning a slave, Patience, Rules, slave, Submission, submissive, sucking cock, sucking dick, Total Power Exchange, Total Slavery, TPE, training your slave on November 17, 2013 by thekinkyworldofvile

At our last Munch Arianna met a new Slave, new to the lifestyle. She was there to meet Sir E who I have very much respect for.  Although I may not agree with everything he believes in, we are all different so I do try to keep an open mind.

As Dominants we all train different, we all want different things from out Slaves, different goals. How one Dominant trains his Slave is really none of my business, her rules, her task, what ever it is really nothing to me. If I see some type of abuse I may say something but other than that to each their own.

Sir E instructed his new Slave to contact Arianna , I suppose for advice, tips and friendship. She started sending Arianna emails asking questions since she is new to the lifestyle. This is her first Master and Slave relationship, this is also her first poly relationship, so yes there are a ton of questions.

I myself lived in a poly relationship , the second female was mainly my slaves pet we never had sex nor did I want to. If it had been the other way around and all three of us were really close I do not know if I could of giving both the attention that was needed. I think Sir E has 4 or 5 Slaves, but as far as I know only one lives with him.

In my world and my views Slaves are very needy, this is not true will all Slaves but I believe for the most they are. Some slaves can be independent when needed, while some do not want that independence. I prefer the later.

Being a Slave does not make one a Doormat either, being a Slave does not make one weak, being a Slave does not make one Dumb. Slaves are very strong willed.

So Arianna forwarded and email response and was seeking my approval before she sent it. As I was reading the email it really got me to thinking because I had heard all of this before, but maybe I did not listen as well as I should have. Some of it caught me off guard, but the entire email really impressed me.

Many of the people we meet in the lifestyle do not really understand how our relationship works. This sounds funny coming from Master’s and Slave’s

Just like at the Last MAST the first question I was asked is how do we argue? My answer was we do not argue we never have. When I make this statement and I have several times in a group. THERE HAS TO BE A BITCH IN THE HOUSE. As I am looking around I see the Jaws drop, mostly from Slaves and Submissive’s I live by those words, and I stick to them on a daily basis. Why would a Slave argue with their Master, more so why would a Master stand for it. If the two argue is it truly a M’s relationship?

I treat Arianna very well, as you will read from her email. I have the up most respect for Arianna as you will read. There is no abuse in our relationship as you will read. One thing I want to point out is you will see that we are a true Master and Slave, we live in a TPE Total Power Exchange relationship.

There has been a few emails from this other Slave but I am going to share one, and then Arianna’s response.

On Nov 16, 2013, at 10:48 AM, @aol.com> wrote:

OKAY!!!! you win. Just thought i got lost in that social calendar of yours……lol

my real name just for “us” not munchers ……:-0

 

is E some people call me LAINEY…….nowadays i seem to answer to alot of things……..lol

 

 

MASTER did not approve of slave name list so i am back to ground zero

 

i won’t be seeing him this week either    bummer all the way around.

 

 

So, what’s on your agenda for Thanksgiving i forgot  if you told me. do you cook? bake? Do you spoil your Sir? Does he spoil you?

 

Do you have vaniila family? DO they know? approve? Is it separate? mine would commit me…i couldn’t even explain.

 

 

i am a fabulous cook and baker . BUT since losing weight i don’t No temptation  for me. I seem to be a two note prson i want something in my mouth either or seems to do the trick.  so i’m not doing food anymore…….haha

 

 

No more discussion about the positions “Just keep practicing” i’m told. This is like the CIA need to know basis .

 

 

it’s the POLY part i guess cause you know how we women are …has to be difficult to keep evryone happy im sure its easy to keep everyone in line  but Happy ? that’s probably different. ???????? very  different. i like different  so this is all about trying new and living  for now and seeing everything i missed being a good little wifey……….

 

 

What does your day include ? Does your Master give you assignments? Do you ever meet him for sexy lunches?

 

Do you ever start things to surprise him? Does he have total power over that? What if you wanted to,  but he hadn’t initiated it?

 

What if he said  NO?  Would he make you beg? Could you seduce him into changing his mind?  Yes, i have been reading again? just curious……if too personal don’t answer. I am curious about some things that are involving slave Master things if i ask and you dont want to reply just say no comment E  go read. i won’t be offended i’m just trying to see if this is normal or weird? of course who can really judge what’s normal for one is weird for another but i guess i mean is it usual in the “life”.

 

but for the record i have no say in anything so far i just show up when told it’s 100% surrender of power. at this point i can have some passes on some things i’m scared of “still never done yet”-we discussed but once collared that goes away.

 

is that normal? slave/ MASTER stuff?

 

 

It looks like a day to be outside so i’m leaving now…..have a good one  take care beauty! from J, E, Rebekah,Jamsine,

 

Cassandra, ect ect ect……..OH the KING and i……….

 

 

As you can see there are a ton of questions. I suppose Master E instructed the Slave to write Arianna, because for one she is experienced , two Master E knows we are a true Master and Slave, three he knows Arianna will not cross any boundary’s. four Master E knows Arianna will be truthful.

 

Here is Arianna’s response.

 

 

My response is first. Her email is second.
This is unsent. Waiting for your approval. Master
Dear E,
Well E was one of my guesses so you have to give me credit there.
I’ll try and answer most of your questions. Forgive me if I miss a couple.
Thanksgiving- my mom, stepdad, adopted baby brother (he’s 11) and his friend are coming over to our house for dinner. My mom and stepdad know about my lifestyle although my mom doesn’t like hearing about it. She knows that our wedding and collaring ceremony was rolled into one and did not want to attend. That was fine because it would have made it awkward. Lol
Other than my parents, no one else in my family is aware although I wear my collar 24/7.
I do most of the cooking lately. Mainly because Master works more than me. He does spoil me though with surf and turf dinners and all the fixings sometimes. He enjoys cooking but just doesn’t have the time. Although he is the grill god. We grill at least once a week. My baking consists of boxed cakes and brownies. Hehe
My day…  Well when I get home from work, I must shower before Master gets home so I am all clean and ready for use if he so chooses. I have responsibilities of keeping the house, I do 95% of the shopping and cleaning and laundry. It’s not a big deal though. I think woman in general like to keep a clean house.
Each morning when Master and I have our coffee together I write a to do list which either gets approved, added to, or items vetoed. Master does not like me to get too tired and realizes that with me working full time that some things on the list may not get done. He will asterisk the important things.
Master wakes up with me at 3:40am on my work days. Everyday without fail. He will also talk to me in the phone during my hour commute. This is before he himself works a 9-11 hour day.
I am open to initiate serving him sexually. He likes when I ask to service him but sometimes the answer is no. He has total control over that. Most of the time it’s about him but if I ask I sometimes can play too.  I do not, seduce him. It’s really not an option because he is in control at all times. So if it happens then he so chooses whether I am putting on a show or not. He is the first man I met that doesnt think with his dick.  His no means no.
I also would be hard pressed to define what is “normal” in the lifestyle because there are so many variations.
I know that, for my Master and I, the collar means a commitment similar to a marriage. It a consensual agreement for me to be a servant to his wants and needs. I gave myself to him and trust that he will not push hard enough to break me. He does not want to harm his property but takes great care to make sure that I have my needs met. The wants, maybe. But my needs definitely are met.
That is the basis of our commitment to each other. I take care of his wants and needs and he gives me what he decides I need for ultimately he knows me best. He gives me structure and purpose. A guided hand to lead the way. Most of the information about our issues are on a need to know basis. He does not involve me in some things because he handles everything. I gave all my rights to him and I only have the rights that he allows me to have.
I ask for permission to use the restroom, and sit on furniture when we are together. When we are apart I can use the restroom at will but still not allowed on our furniture at the house except for the dining room table. Permission is needed to sit on soft things.  Lol
Permission is needed to enter and exit the bed. My Master controls my sleep, when I go to bed and if I get a nap. And When I shower.
Some of our rituals include me keeping journals of my activities. For example. When I leave the house I write down time and mileage in a book. He wants to know when I arrive some place and when I’m leaving. Permission is needed for any stop that I make if it’s not planned ahead of time.
I also keep a log of my activities when I am home alone. This includes times of things I do. For example, log how long it took to wash dishes, take a shower, when I put laundry in, clean the bird cage, vacuum, make the bed, etc.
I am considered micromanaged which isn’t for everyone. Most masters don’t want to be bothered with the details like that but it works for us.
There are things that I do without being asked. I greet Master at the door usually naked and in a kneeling/head to the floor. Arms stretched out position.
Sometimes when he leaves the room, I wait in a kneeling position for his return. I dry him off once he is out of the shower and kneel next to the tub when he’s in the shower. I help undress him after he gets home from work and lay out his clothes. I normally will pick his clothes out for him to wear out. He has full say over what I wear out although I get to give him options which he can overrule at any time.
He has say over the color of my nails and hair.
I wear a bracelet engraved WWVD- what would Vile do
This reminds me that my actions both public and private reflect my submission.
He has access to my phone which includes all texts, contacts, and emails. Basically he has full control.
Our communication though is like no other. He listens. Really listens and remembers every thought. He is inquisitive about how I’m feeling and what’s going on in my mind. I feel totally indebted to him and respect him galore.
Anyways…. I was kind of all over the place but hope that gave you an insight Into my slavehood. But this is only my own experience. Yours could be totally different.
Sincerely
Arianna.
When I read this I was just blown away. I am going to print it and save it, so when we are out at other functions and people ask, I will just say here read.
I do not think with my cock. I did that when I was a teen in my early 20’s maybe even very early 30’s ….. I run my house, I have the final say. This does not mean I never ask for advice or Arianna’s opinion because I do. Just like she stated most everything is on a need to know basis.
Arianna spoke the truth. I do get serviced anytime I wish but she does ask several times a day if she can service me. That is how you can tell if someone truly cares. Yes most of the time it is about me. I want to fuck bust a nut and go about what I was doing.  Her Body and mind belong to me. The same with her mouth pussy and ass, which I use when I wish, and I use how I want to. As you read I give a lot back, I just do not take. Arianna gives 150% while I give 200% that is on a daily basis.
Much Love to everyone who has stopped by. It is you the readers that keeps me going. I will have a website up pretty soon, so I can be more open, more so with the picture thing, but everything will be from my WordPress.
Image Our Slave does look up to us.
Vile

 

Is There Really A Difference In Daddy Doms

Posted in abuse, Acceptance, anger, bdsm, BDSM Communitys, Bond, Cherish, Collars, control, controlling, Daddy, Daddy Dom, Daddy Doms, Dominants, events, fetlife, slave, submissive, swinger club, Under Consideration on August 5, 2013 by thekinkyworldofvile

Over the past 10 years or so Daddy Doms have become very popular. going back to the mid 80’s you were either a Top, a Bottom , a Master or Slave. The word submissive rarely came to surface.

Most if not all clubs were invitation only, and you had to know someone to even be considered. In the early 90’s there was a swingers club here local called charlie woods. A very nice couple ran the place, but if you wanted to attend you had to exchange a couple of emails, then a phone call, then finely meet in person for an interview. This was to keep all the wackos out.  Although it was not a private club they did have a set of standards.

Myself at that time had a name out in the community, I was really feared by most, although that is not what I was trying to accomplish it just happened. Then there were not that many what you would call hardcore Sadist, nor were there very many hardcore Masochist far and few between. Since I had only really been with one slave who was a Masochist that is pretty much all I knew.

Since then I have calmed down a lot, what use to get me off as far as pain really does not interest me any longer. I take a softer stance, and a much different out look on D’s and M’s.

So over the years the lifestyle branched out and different names began to pop up, Dominant, Master, Poly, Hetroflexible which means anything is game on. Then came the switch which to this day I do not understand, more so when it comes to the male Dominant.

If you look at some of the fetlife profiles some of the sexual orientation is just unreal, and the list of names they are either associated with protecting, or even under consideration. I have seen as many as 20 names. Master Bob is protecting Slave Karman who lives three thousand miles away. Or Master Gary is considering Slave Kathy who lives in another country, even better being collard by someone you have never even met.

Then along comes the Daddy Dom, I have filled and enjoyed this role, many do not understand the concept or the mindset of the relationship. Even today when I talk to some they still consider it to be gross, acting out incest. Conversation over.

So we have the Daddy Dominant, then we have the Dominant. We both want the same for ours. We both want improvement, we both set goals, we both want to see ours excel in everything. We are both there for support, we both care, we both communicate. So the question is. Is there really any difference?

We both step in to fill a void, we both step in to take control, we both earn respect, and we both give respect. We both praise when one has done well, and we both punish when a rule is broken.

You call one Daddy the other calls one Master. In the lifestyle much of the past is forgotten, but things change everyday, we grow, and our needs are different. Even in a relationship our needs change our kinks change, so it if very important to be with someone you can openly communicate with.

I do know today Daddy Doms are not as strict, most are forgiven very easy, maybe scolded but rarely punished, so most baby girls are submissive, very few are slaves.

While at a munch sometime ago I met a Daddy Dom and we were outside talking, he had just met his Little girl, and we were talking about the difference. Then the arguing thing came up, he said they did argue at times, which I do not understand, but to each their own, if it works then so be it.

We all want ours to excel, be better. So why is it that we are so different when the only difference is a Title that most self impose on themselves instead of it being given. I am Master Johnny and you will respect me. Um yea okay.

A couple of years ago, and what a small world a guy called me out of the blue, he had gotten my phone number from a slave I use to live with, at that time I did fill the Daddy Dom role, not so much because I liked it or needed it, it was what she needed. Anyway I jump in my car drive some 60 miles, I walk up to the door and I hear yelling and screming, I am thinking WOW really WTF. So I knock and this guy answers the door he is a lot taller than I am which is not hard to be, he invites me in and the living room and kitchen is a mess broken glass all over the place. The Slave just looks at me very surprised to see that I am even there. I am not sure at this point why I was even called, besides my name being brought up in his face several times a day. They start yelling again and I am just amazed

So I tell her to shut her cock sucker up and sit down, and when she did sit down this guy just looked at me and the room got very quite. I said what the fuck is going on? How did you get my number? Why did you even call me?  They fought everyday, which to this day I do not understand because while with me that was not her demeanor, nor was it her personality, but I suppose if you push the right buttons anything is possible.

He could not believe the control I still had even after not seeing her for over a year. The bottom line was it was all about respect, the respect I had earned, and not demanded. I truly thought after seeing her I would have feelings, but nah the past is the past. If you live in the past you are stuck, and your past will not allow you to move forward.

At one time he had even asked me to mentor him which lasted all of two or three days, it is all good, I had enough on my plate. I really did not need anymore task, and to this day he is still single.

It does not matter what role you play in your relationship it boils down to respect. Respect is earned you cannot demand it. Okay sure you can demand and the giving can be fake but if that cranks your tractor then go for it.

I can really see no difference in the two types of Doms, in the end we both want the same things.

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Vile

Sub-Drop

Posted in 24/7, abuse, Aftercare, Arianna, bdsm, BDSM Safety, BDSM Session, Beatings, Bipolar, blindfold, Bondage, cage, Cherish, communication, Consensual, control, controlling, Conversation, Depression, Dominants, Fear, Humiliation, masochist, Master, Masters, Mental illness, Pain, positive reinforcement, Praise, Safe, Safe and Sane, Scared, session, slave, Stressed, Sub Drop, submissive on July 17, 2013 by thekinkyworldofvile

Sub-drop is something that has to be dealt with right after a session, or rough play. I firmly believe that sub-drop can be prevented with the right care.  While some may disagree I am speaking from over 20 years of experience in the lifestyle. I am not some dude who got out of bed Friday and said I am a Dom on your knees bitch.

You spend a couple of hours in a session, playing rough, not making love but just raw, sweaty hard fucking. Last weekend Arianna and I spent about 3 hours in play from being bound in the cage, tied to the bed spread eagle, blindfolded not knowing what was going on, not a clue. I cannot even imagine that feeling. Being able to hear but you cannot see.

I love using sexually, it is like mini golf I want to play all three holes and then start over. Sometimes I don’t even want to cum because I don’t want to lose that feeling.

I love face fucking, to me face fucking making her gag is one of the most humiliating things a man can do to a woman. I love feeling the throat muscles wrap around my cock feeling that gagging sensation. WOW.

Sub-Drop there are a couple of different definitions. one being, Physical Sub Drop the other being Mental

Physical Sub-Drop during a hard play session where a lot of impact play is going on, your body see’s this as more of a trauma. So naturally the body goes into the defense mode, pulling most of the blood to the to the torso area to protect the organs, yes think about this for a second, your mind is one place, but your body is in another.  While you are enjoying the play your body is going what the fuck.

Then comes the Mental part of Sub-Drop Mental Sub-Drop is much harder to see, It varies in such a great degree from person to person but usually takes the forms of guilt, anxiety,depression, and or agitation. This can happen right after a session or it can take up to several days for Sub-Drop to kick in.

There are several things we have to look at before any type of hard play. Things should be talked about like types of medications they are taking, mind altering , for depression or any other mental illness. If someone is suffering from Bi-polar then you have to adjust your play and not push to far.  If the Dominant does not know the submissive inside out there are things that should be considered. It is up to the Dominant to look out for the Submissive, we are to insure their safety.

Normally after a session the submissive has a feeling of being relaxed, not caring, very much at home feeling, and very tired the submissive will be mentally drained. Let them rest take a nice hot bath, bath them talk to them.

Aftercare is very important, if you just spent an hour beating a submissive and you untie and just walk away then you are not a good Dominant, I use the word beating loosely by the way.

While it is true after a session some do want to be left alone for a while so their mind can process everything that just happened. During a session you should be in constant communication with the Submissive insuring they are in fact okay. Again you the Dominant are responsible for their safety.

Give them some time alone if they need, let them curl up in a ball and process everything, even take a nap.

After you should step in, hold and pet, talk to about everything that happened. Praise the Submissive for doing so well. Talk about any limits that were tested or pushed.

Even if there was no real impact play , and everything was mainly mental the impact on the body can still be devastating.

That is why I myself believe Aftercare should be Proactive, and not just used after play, more so if the submissive is a masochist.

Certain medications and hard impact play do not go well together. If your submissive suffers from any type of depression and is taking mind altering drugs then there must be communication. You as the Dominant may decide there is a better approach to playing or you may decide not to play at all. Again we are to look out for ours.

I am going to pass on a link that I think everyone should read and maybe it will explain a little more about your feelings after play.

http://subshelpingsubs.tripod.com/articles/subdrop.html

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Much Love

Vile

What Is Expected From Us As Dominants

Posted in 24/7, A Masters Creed, abuse, Aftercare, Arianna, bdsm, BDSM Safety, Cherish, codependent, Collar, Collars, communication, Consensual, control, controlling, Conversation, Discipline, Dominance, Dominants, Giving Head, Honesty, Lie, Love, Loyal, Master, Masters, oral, oral sex, Pain, Protocol, Protocol public, punish, Punishment, Respect, Rules, sadist, Safe, Safe and Sane, Safe Word, serve, session, sex, slave, Spanking, submissive on June 23, 2013 by thekinkyworldofvile

We are expected to be men of honor. We are expected to be truthful in all ways. We are expected to be in control and not controlling, and yes at times Humble.

Arianna will tell you I am a thinker, I think before acting, I look at choices and consequences, most of the time I am right. Then at times no matter how much planing you do things just do not go your way.

I had someone ask me not long ago, how are you always right, how is it you can never be wrong, this is true. My answer was I live by the book, even as Dominants we have to live by the outside world rules, no matter how much we disagree, there are rules that still has to be followed. When I was younger I tried to beat the system, any chance I got, I was trying to cut corners. Well surprise it does not work, you will get slapped every time.

How can we put in place rules and protocols and expect them to be followed, if we as Dominants do not do the same. We are looked up to, we are depended on, we are giving trust , and total devotion. mind and body.

If we cannot be truthful, and honest, how is it we come to expect the same from a submissive or slave. The first words out of our mouth when talking to a new submissive, is always be truthful, never lie to me.

If we cannot be truthful, and honest we have no right demanding the same from another. If you cannot be truthful, how does one come to have expectations from a submissive, how can we make demands.

We as Dominants have a creed, we are suppose to be different, and yes it is true we are of the few.  I talk to vanilla men daily and when my relationship comes up, they admit they would not want that type of responsibility. To much work, fuck that.

On the other hand how many of those men can snap their finger and their pants are being unzipped. How many of those men can tell their partners to go spread. How many of those men are told no to certain sex acts such as anal, or I don’t swallow. These are very unhappy men. Most vanilla men do not want the responsibility of taking care of the house, with the exception of those who are controlling, that is a far different story.

While sex is a small part of a D’s or M’s relationship it is there. The do’s and dont’s should of been worked out prior to entering a relationship and the do not’s should be respected, although at times I will try to push limits, which there are very few in our relationship, but those in place are respected. By respecting their limits is how we gain respect,and trust.

. It really blows my mind to hear one Dominant speak badly of another. Well he does not know what he is doing, or he is not real. I keep my mouth shut unless it is a clear case of abuse. We all have different rules, expectations, and needs. I myself run a very tight ship. I have tight rules in place, if one is broken we talk about it, if it is broken again then choices and consequences come into play. I am very fair. I have not expected Arianna to be able to memorize the rules, but she does read daily as a reminder, fuck I cannot even memorize them how could I expect her to. I have tight protocols in place public and private, Arianna acts the same if we are alone or company is present. The only change I allow is around her friends and family.

The Collar, Arianna’s collar is similar to an enternity collar. It was made in Arkansas, Houseofcollars.com the man did an awesome job, although you can see a few imperfection, that makes the collar a one of a kind. Arianna wears it daily it never comes off, this includes while at work, shopping, or visiting her parents. While they do know about our lifestyle they do not understand.

What Ariannas mother has told me, is she has seen a positive change, our relationship has been good for Arianna. I have tried to sit her mother down and explain everything, but as usual people only hear what they want to hear, but it is all good. I am welcomed in their home anytime, we text back and forth all the time.

We as Dominants are expected to keep our word. If we set rules in place, the rules should not be changed. I have allowed Arianna to speak up and she voiced her opinion about certain rules and how they would do better if changed or re-worded, the change for for her benefit. I welcome thoughts and concerns.

The worst punishment a slave can have is knowing they have broken a rule. The funny thing is they know, and this causes much hurt. In some cases this is punishment enough. Beating one is not the answer. If a rule is broken talk to find out what happened,

Most use safe words, during play, I do not, mainly because I still have that sadist buried deep inside. The other is I know Ariannas limitations and I do not push. I know what excites her, and what displeases her. I know what excites me as well. If you push one to far you can break that trust, once it is broken the slave can say everything is okay or forgiving but the amount of trust you had at one time is now gone.

Arianna a couple of times during play has said let me feel pain. I knew she really did not mean that. Those words were words she thought I wanted to hear. Until she met me she thought it was all about pain.

If your new to the lifestyle a safe word should be in place at least until you both get to know each other. Our main concern is that of our property. If you break your toy, you cannot play with it.

We should cherish what we have, and truly show we care, communication, aftercare after play, take an interest in their needs. Do things the slave or submissive likes to do.

The reward is truly unlimited.

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Vile

Is Old Leather Guard Just A Myth ?

Posted in 24/7, abuse, Advice, bdsm, BDSM Communitys, Bdsm events, blow job, Cherish, Consensual, control, controlling, Conversation, cum, Dominants, dress, Dress Protocol, Fake Dominants, Fake submissive, Giving Head, Health, Honesty, Kink, kinkster, kinky, Loyal, Master, Masters, molding your slave, munchs, Myth, Old Leather Guard, oral, oral sex, Patience, pleasure, Private Protocol, Protocol, Protocol public, pussy, Safe and Sane, sex, sex slaves, sharing, slave, submissive, sucking dick, Task, Total Slavery, TPE, training your slave on March 17, 2013 by thekinkyworldofvile

Arianna and I attended a New Munch yesterday, in hopes of finding a permanent group, both of us were really disappointed. Although the people were really nice and welcomed us with open arms, it is just not what we are looking for. We may give it another chance but I truly doubt it. The munchs we attend are solely for Arianna. I myself believe it is very important for ones slave to interact with others alike. I also believe it is very important for the Master or Owner to insure there is growth within the relationship. Just my opinion.

Every time we have left an event Arianna has made the comment. I cannot believe the way the other slaves acted, or the way they talked back to their Master. Well she is correct, I go back to what I call Old Guard. There was Honor, Respect, and yes again Protocol.

Although I am a smoker, there was never smoking allowed in a Dungeon , or drinking before play. Most of all a Slave would never make rude comments to her Master even jokingly.

Arianna is always dressed very nice. A comment was made from another submissive we had met, on how good Arianna always looked. This is the truth, I dress her. I tell her what to wear, how I want her hair, and makeup, and what shoes to wear.

Last month we left a munch and another Dominant made the comment, maybe I should just find a slave I could dehumanize. Wow really I knew the comment was made towards me. While I did not take offense to the comment, I found it to be somewhat expected coming from him.

Okay maybe just maybe I am somewhat unorthodox , in the way I believe a house should be ran, maybe I am a little to strict, maybe I expect my slave to excel, no matter what she is doing. Maybe I do control every movement, right down to what she eats and how much. Maybe just maybe sex is on my terms. Last night I allowed her to come, I am guessing it had been a little over two weeks. I made her masturbate while giving me head. I could tell she was in heat, so I allowed her to get on top. It took her all of thirty seconds to cum. Then afterwards I heard a very soft , Thank You.

Old Leather Guard started off within the Gay community in the early seventy’s and quickly spread through out the community. Why? the respect, honor and protocol.

I would also like to say I am not a suck my cock Dominant, my cock does not run my life, although Arianna does have awesome skills when it comes to oral. Getting my cock sucked is not my only thought.

The truth is, it is about me, and only me, and I will explain. Being a Dominant is not just a game. A male cannot wake up one morning and say I am a master, or just because you are in a D’s relationship does not make you a master. If your a master and your with a submissive or slave and your her first dominant or she thinks your a dominant , but your just using her to get your rocks off, eh not so much of one.

The care that goes into owning a slave is a great responsibility, my day does not end until after I have tucked Arianna into bed for the night. The last thing she does before going to sleep is the reading of my rules. Then I can relax for the night. That is my down time kick my feet up, and maybe watch a little TV. In the morning I wake , I turn the coffee pot on, my cup and the bowl of sugar is sitting next to the pot.  Once Arianna wakes she makes the request to get up. I then make her a cup of coffee and we set and we talk, about her dreams or we plan out the day. I keep Arianna busy with small task through out the day as well.

Today everyone is more interested in getting what someone else has. I have been asked numerous times if I share, and the answer is no I do not share, nor will I ever. What is mine is just that mine.

Where is the respect factor when it comes to other Dominants. Okay so Dominants my age are a breed who is slowly dieing out. I have been turned away from munchs by a twenty year old Dom because I was to old for the group. Again where is the respect. It is not like I was showing up for a piece of ass. Where is the protocol? All of the above is gone right out of the window.

Okay your a twenty year old Dominant a master. What are you a master of. What could you of possibly learned in such a short period that has taking me twenty years to learn, and the truth is I am still learning. Everyday I learn something new. To be turned away by a twenty year old, WOW.

Am I unorthodox in my way of thinking. I will tell you the answer is no. I will say this I have gone through a line of subs and so called slaves to find the right connection. The right Slave who could fit my needs. See yes in the end it is about me.

Old Leather Guard. At one time Dominants were very close, Masters and Owners. Information was passed along , great conversation, even a warning list of fake dominants. There was no criticizing on how another dom did not know what he was doing. After all we each have our own way of training. At one time Dominants really got along. Respect to this day you will hear me address an older Dominant as Sir. I am not submitting I am being respectful.

Am I unorthodox ? When I met Arianna she handed me a book, the book was about her. She told me to write another one, she wanted everything erased. The book would be based on how I see a slave. So I grabbed an eraser , and I began to edit Arianna. The process only takes about a month. This is just a start, you begin by taking old habits away and introducing new ones. This cannot be done if you are not 24/7 or you do not see someone on a daily basis.

First and foremost the Slave not only has to be true, but willing. The slave has to truly want the change. It is like I have tried it on my own and it does not work, so here I am.

I run an old Leather Guard style home. To most I am to strict. Arianna has no say so in anything. There is one exception here and only one, and I have made this perfectly clear. If Arianna sees that I am about to make a mistake, which is unlikely to happen, but in the event of me making a mistake, Arianna does have to right to voice her opinion. At that time it is up to me to listen to her. I do value her opinion.

Our relationship is based on respect, our relationship is based on the truth, and nothing but the truth. Our relationship is based on communication. Our relationship is based on the desire to make the relationship work.

Do I get tired? Sure I do mentally tired, not overwhelmed though because I do enjoy the lifestyle and the relationship I am in.

So we are talking a month to get the basics down. I am not talking about handing out a handful of rules that will cause a crash. The first thirty days tells everything, will the slave be able to stick it out or will she run for cover, and find another dominant who is not so strict, or one who does not expect so much.

I have been asked if the Old Leather Guard is real. My answer would be yes, although there are many who would disagree.

If the Master truly cares for his. He will take the time out to teach his way. If the Master truly cares he will listen, he will find the slaves needs. He will care about the slaves emotions. He will want to hold her, and talk and listen.

The rewards at the end of the rainbow are truly there, it is a lot of work but it is there.

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Vile

We Train To Fit Our Needs

Posted in 24/7, abuse, Arianna, bdsm, BDSM Communitys, Bdsm events, BDSM Safety, blow job, Change, Cherish, communication, control, Discipline, Dominants, emotional, Emotions, events, Humiliation, Kink, kinkster, kinky, Master, Masters, Molding, molding your slave, munchs, non caring, oral, oral sex, proactive aftercare, Protocol, Protocol public, provocative, Safe, Safe and Sane, Sane, sex, sharing, slave, submissive, Task, training your slave on February 27, 2013 by thekinkyworldofvile

The word train, or training to many sounds really weird even funny to a lot of people.. Training really just consist of implementing new habits.

Why do Dominants train? Because the submissive or slaves seeks that type of attention. Depending on what your mindset is depends on how far you want to carry the lifestyle.

The truth is and I do not think many will disagree with me, those who are submissive live on the lighter side of BDSM. The Dominant sets rules for the submissive but in time he becomes somewhat lax and does not really enforce. The relationship turns more to just kink,unless the submissive does something that is really out of the norm.

A Slave wants to be owned, a slave needs to have that feeling of being owned. A slave needs that structure. A slave needs to know and feel she is needed.

The hardest thing about being in a Master and Slave relationship is being able to hold the everyday consistency. To say what we mean, and mean what we do.

Once you begin to start changing habit, from where the slave is allowed to sit, the food and the amounts of food the slave is allowed. Having her clothes picked out for her, her bath and bed time. The master takes over her life basically, not an easy task by no means.

The house a slave may only have a few places she is allowed to sit. This makes her feel owned, again it becomes a habit. What she wears once home, you limit her clothing if any, again you are adding new habits.

Arianna and I watched the movie The Pet. She enjoyed the movie, not so much the outcome , but seeing the devotion that a pet could have towards her owner really drove home. The thing that really got Arianna to thinking was the speech restriction , she asked if I would be interested in such a relationship. In a way we are somewhat on the same page but only when out at events or munchs. While out that is when the protocol kicks in.

Many submissives and slaves take the lifestyle serious, until they enter into a full relationship. Once they see it really takes a lot of work, one will tend to back off and change their outlook on the type of relationship they are seeking.

Many submissives or slaves make the comments I am an open book, or I am a blank canvas paint me, but once the dominant begins to paint, thoughts rush through the subs mind. Tis is not what she expected. She feels she is giving up to much of herself and more so her freedom.

A slaves outlook is totally different. A slave does not want or require freedom, but and this is a big but, they do need down time. Down time is needed it gives the slave time to breath, relax. If you ran a car for 24 hrs a day it would break down. The same thing can happen with a slave. I give Arianna down time every week. This is her free time to do as she pleases. Right now she is working on a quilt with an old friend of hers. I give one day a week and a couple of hours. At times I can see she may be a little stressed, so I send her to the bedroom for down time. She is allowed to listen to music, or write in her journal.

The down time giving is like I blogged about proactive-aftercare. I am always on the look out to insure Arianna’s well being. She is my responsibility.

In the lifestyle I have those who just love me, then I have those who hate me. The hate comes from how I run my house. The hate comes from me being so open. If I think your bullshitting me, I will call you out on it right there. Those who love me are true friends, and they know what I am about and where I am coming from. Most of those who do not like me are new to the lifestyle. I have nothing against them, today it is more about kink, nothing really to do with BDSM.

If you look at some of the groups today on fetlife, it has really nothing to do with the letters BDSM. The words kinkster is used more often. Even munchs have moved towards the word kinkster, the Dungeon in Orlando now is about kinksters, and not BDSM

Here is the kicker. I have been asked several times if I would share Arianna. I have been asked if they could fuck her, or if I would let her give them head. Really I swear. These are the people who dislike me.

When we as dominants train, we need to look at the needs, not the wants. The idea is to break old habits and create new ones. We take the bad habits away, and replace with good positive habits. The rules should be the same way.

When I was younger my rules were more sexually based, okay so I did not know any better. It really took me a long time to realize I was doing more harm than good. I was only looking out for me. It was about 7 or 8 years into the lifestyle before I found out the slave had to come first.

If you have a dominant and your rules are just based on sex, I would rethink the relationship.Don’t get me wrong I love to fuck, but the relationship runs so much deeper. The thought process should be different, unless your just into the kink of things.

I do use a few of the slave positions , not on a daily basis. I use them to put Arianna back in that frame of mind, they make her feel somewhat humble, and she feels some humiliation, again not everyday. As long as they continue to serve there purpose I will continue to use, I tend to change things up to keep Arianna off guard.

Okay today I am just rambling , this was something that just popped in my head.

 

Vile

Dominants Live Separate Lives

Posted in 24/7, abuse, anger, bdsm, Bond, Busy, Cherish, communication, control, Discipline, Dominants, emotional, Emotions, Fantasy, Friends, Love, Master, Micromanagement, Open Minded, owning a slave, relationships, Respect, sharing, slave, Spanking, submissive, Text on January 28, 2013 by thekinkyworldofvile

It is true Dominants for the most live separate lives. When in general conversation with lets say someone who is vanilla, and I try to explain my lifestyle, most are like do you know anyone, do you know a slave or single submissive?

Yea they think it is fun and games, until I explain everything, and owning a Slave, and they are like fuck that shit, way to much work for me.

Even like the dumb ass who is staying with me, I have been trying to teach him for months, how to control his temper. I have even said  would you not want a relationship that is stress free, no arguing, no fighting. He said no>

Now many of you are probably thinking , no arguing, really? When I say no arguing that is what I mean. We Dominants should be in full control at all times. There are times when my fuse runs short, at times I do get angry, but I rarely show it. I never show in front of my property. Here is why, if we show we are not in full control, then how can our sub or slave expect us to be in control of them?

We Dominants or for the most do live separate lives. We live our everyday life for those who do not want anyone to know about their lifestyle, but anyone who knows me knows about me. Then we have to be in control of our property, on a daily basis. Then we have to stay consistent daily with rules and guidelines. We have to maintain an open line of communication, we have to be available, at a text or call. We have to not only solve our problems, but at times we have to handle our property’s problems, and in a timely manner.

I do not find this to be true if you are not 24/7. I know a Master and Slave who live together but they are not 24/7, I am not sure how that works, but it works for them.

Tish / Arianna and I are 24/7 and I am here to tell you it is not an easy task, not that I am complaining, because for one, I enjoy who I am I truly love me. The lifestyle is me and has been for as long as I can remember. The lifestyle is something I need. It is not a want, if it was a want, well I would not be here right now.

Sometimes at the end of the night, after I put Tish / Arianna to bed, that is my time to relax. I am up at 3.30am with her and she goes to bed around 7.00pm. We are in contact through out the day. When she is off sometimes she is up a little later. So at times at the end of the day, I am not physically tired but mentally. I guess what ever brain I have left is pretty tired.

I am not complaining do not get me wrong, I do care a great deal for Tish / Arianna, and I would change nothing in my life right now. I am on a level playing field right now. Life is good, and it will continue to get better I know without a doubt.

I believe it is a lot different with a submissive as a matter of fact I know it is. A submissive submits when she wants to, most of the time it is not 24/7.A slave you have to keep a tight leash on so to speak. Tish / Arianna are more Micromanagement, which is really not as difficult as one would think as long as I stay on top of everything. If you fall behind it is like trying to catch your house payment up, it is almost impossible.

Many of my friends in the lifestyle do not agree with my point of view when it comes to D’s or M’s. Many find me to be um kinda of unorthodox when it comes to the lifestyle, but it works for me. I am not going to change who I am. Many do not understand why I do not share, or why I do not want another slave. I suppose in many ways I am possessive when it comes to my property. I am not one to lay back and watch some dude fuck my slave or watch her blow someone, although she would if I told her to, but she would only to please me.

There is a breaking point, and somethings can cause more damage to a sub or slave than it can good. Many will step outside of there bubbles just to please, but later it can bring on great emotional stress or even a breakdown. Us as Dominants are not here for that, we are here for support and to build up, a shoulder to cry on when needed, hold, love and cherish.

I did something the other day I was totally against. I had to punish Tish / Arianna. One thing I said I never would do is spank as a form of punishment, but that is what I felt I had to do for the situation. To make it worse she had to complete a task while she was being spanked, and I did not stop until her task was completed. I cannot remember when I really felt as bad as I did at that moment and time, but I believe I got the point across and it will not happen again.

We as Dominants do live separate lives, I just hope that you submissive’s and Slaves know just how much we have to put into a relationship.

Much Love to all of those who visit, and to those who follow, I really appreciate all of you.

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Vile

Owning A Slave

Posted in abuse, bdsm, BDSM Safety, Change, Cherish, codependent, Consensual, control, controlling, Discipline, Dominants, emotional, Emotions, FaceBook, Friendship, Master, needy, No Rights, owning a slave, Patience, pleasure, Safe, Safe and Sane, slave, submissive on January 22, 2013 by thekinkyworldofvile

Owning a Slave in my eyes requires a lot more responsibility than owning a submissive. While a submissive does have limits, and most do not follow rules, and at times a submissive is far more resistant in training than a slave.

While a slave does not have any rights, the slave does have the trust knowing her Master / Owner will not push her further than she can go, be it mentally or physically . The slave has enough trust to know that she is being looked after, and cared for.

Now before I enter a relationship, I make it a point to ask. How do you see your everyday life as a slave? What are your everyday needs as a Slave? How do you want to be treated? This is what I implement , her words are my guide. The slave only knows what it will take to put her in the type of mode she wishes to be in.

This is not an easy task, one has to prove he can be consistent, not just from time to time, but on a daily basis, an hourly basis, while keeping an open line of communication.

Does this make a woman weak? Does the lifestyle make her any less of a woman? I would say not in anyway, it makes her strong, and in her own way independent. The truth is most women dream of being in the place Tish / Arianna is. Being able to let go, not only emotionally , but mentally, and sexually.To have a fully structured life that is tailored to fit just one person, and not a one size fits all.

Abuse plays a role when one is forced into a situation, when violence comes into play, Violence comes in many forms, be it verbal, mental, or even physical. Being forced to serve, or not respecting ones limits, crossing that line, pushing one to the point of breaking..

So living a structured life, everything is planned out for you. No drama, no arguing, no putting down. Being controlled in a respectful manner, putting one in that Garden of Eden if you will. Someplace peaceful, more so with someone you can fully trust knowing they will be there no matter what, be it in a stern and strict manner, or showing compassion and love.

So my whole point is, owning a slave is a great deal of responsibility, you cannot live a double life, the Dominants life has to be centered and focused on his slave 24/7, there to meet her needs no matter what they are.

So Tish and I were talking, and the topic of getting her hair cut came up. She wanted to know if there was a certain way I would like her hair to be. She stated she would be willing to do so. So as you can imagine my mind began to run at full speed. To have someone give up such control, and me being who I am. I was willing to take such control. We began looking at pictures and I picked out a hair style I liked.

On my FaceBook I post pictures of us to give updates, and I have a friend who follows my blog I email pics to as well. I did post a new pic of Tihs’s / Arianna’s hair style, so those who are members of my group has seen her. I will post a pic of the style I choose.

To own a slave is a great gift. I cannot think of a greater gift in life. I cannot imagine anything greater, nor can I imagine someone giving up so much to be happy , and the place they need to be.

Much Love to Everyone.

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Tish’s new hair style. It will grow back or maybe I will keep it like this for a while.. At that time that was my need.

Vile

I Was Somewhat Annoyed Last Night

Posted in abuse, Annoyed, bdsm, bi-sexual, Bond, Bondage, chain, Chained to the floor, Cherish, Christians, Consensual, controlling, Dominants, Email, fetlife, Friends, Friendship, fucking, Health, Master, Open Minded, oral, oral sex, poly, Protocol, pussy, Safe, Safe and Sane, sex, sharing, slave, sucking dick, Text, Trust, Vanilla, Verbal abuse on December 24, 2012 by thekinkyworldofvile

Tish and I had just finished Dinner, and a knock at the door, a very good friend of mine came over , but she did not recognize him because he was not in uniform, once he told her who he was I told her to let him in. He has a habit of just showing up, but we are really close so I do not mind.

He had his slave with him, I guess they had just returned from Orlando. I could tell almost immediately that their main focus was on Tish, so I just kinda went with the flow of things. We have been really good friends for a couple of years, soI tend to look over a lot of things.

I could see him looking at his slave, as if he was waiting on something, and the subject of sharing came up again. We had already been over this or I thought,, maybe I did not make myself clear the first time.

I am not going to post pictures of Tish on here, but I did post one of us at Seaworld on my FB in my group. You have to be a member to see, sorry about that. Tish is really smoking hot, a little taller than I am, as a matter of fact I am the shortest man she has ever dated.

Anyway I just cannot believe the subject even came up again, with my friend knowing how I feel about sharing. I forget what we were talking about, and out of the blue his slave says so you do not share. Tish was standing by in the service position, and I had to remind her about offering company drinks. I did not really say anything Tish is still in the learning mode, and it does take time.

So again I explain why I do not share. Now if for some reason Tish wanted to be with a female, which she does not, I would allow, and I would not take part in anyway.. She has been with a woman before, and does not really care for it.

If I just out right told her to she would, and not even hesitate, but it would only be to please me.

Here is the thing, we as Dominants are to take care of ours. I have been mentoring a young couple who both has anger issues, but the male when he gets upset, he tends to say some very nasty things. that are very hurtful.

So I asked him, give me one good reason why you two should argue? I am just asking for one reason. He could not answer, as a matter of fact anyone reading this cannot give me a reason. She on the other hand gets angry because he has trouble telling the truth. that I can somewhat understand, but it is still not a valid reason to argue.You call him out on it confront and let it go.

Ladies, subs and slaves, here is my way of thinking. A woman no matter what her status is, vanilla, submissive, or slave. Cooks the mans meals, does his laundry, keeps the house clean. Here is the kicker, she lays on her back spreads her legs, sucks his dick, gives up the ass , and the male is going to disrespect her, get the fuck out.

Now I love to cook, I do not mind doing the dishes, I will even throw in a load of laundry, not much on folding. I was looking for a slave not a house keeper, or mother.

So if your woman is going to lay on her back and take pretty much what ever you want to do, why would you as a male, Vanilla or Dominant even think of putting your woman down, be it verbal, mental, or physical.

If your a Dominant and you have anger issues, maybe you should rethink your status.  I am not going to say I do not get upset, because I do, I even get angry, I will cuss like a sailor, but never I repeat never at my property. I would never disrespect her in anyway shape or form. Now if you are not in my circle, I do not even see you, I want nothing to do with you, I could really careless. If you are my friend, I will bend over backwards to help you.

So the couple last night are very religious, I do not understand the sharing, but both are very christian like. I started to explain in Viles words.

Look I love to eat pussy way to much, to be down there, and I have this mental picture of some dude banging my bitch. I love to kiss, so thinking of her sucking some dudes cock, well that is not going to happen.

They did exchange phone numbers, and fetlife id’s . Tish received a text about a half hour later. Tish likes to be restrained at night, so I bought her a chain and padlocks , she explained in the text, her chain was ready and she was turning in for the night.

Okay even if I did want her to be with another female, knowing that is really not her thing, is that really fair to Tish. Could it be detrimental to her well being? Sure it could.

As a Dominant, I am suppose to lookout for Tish, not only physically but mentally. , if I force her to do something she really does not want to do, what kind of Dominant does that make me? Will she still respect me after it is all said and done? I think the feelings would change somewhat. I broke my word, from the start I made it clear I do not share. I do not mind someone looking, but hands off. If you were to see Tish’s body you would understand why I do not mind someone else looking.

I was somewhat disappointed in my friend because he had his slave ask yet again, he knew I would not say anything out of the way to her.

I do want Tish to make friends with other Subs and slaves in the lifestyle. I think that is very important for her growth. So she has an understanding of how others live. I would think that would be something every dominant would want.

So call me greedy, stingy, but the bottom line is my pussy is just that my pussy. My friend who was over last night is not the first, it is like dudes are coming out of the woods. WTF.

I just do not get it.

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Seven Most Common Types Of Submissive’s. What are you?

Posted in bdsm, Breaking Rules, Cherish, conceded, control, Daddy, Daddy Dom, Daddy Doms, Discipline, Dominants, Fetish, kinky, Loyal, Master, rude, Rules, Seven Most Common Types Of Submissive’s, slave, submissive, Submissive Brat on December 23, 2012 by thekinkyworldofvile

I ran across this article on Tumbler , Hmm I forgot I even had an account there. Southernbarbie asked me to post about a Brat, which I think fits her really well.

What this article did not cover in the Brat section was, most brats when around other females are usually pretty rude, they can be somewhat cold, and short to the point. The brat needs to be the center of attention. Most times a brat is hard to control, but can be tamed with the right partner, but at times she can still be somewhat defiant, stubborn, and if she has any rules, she does not think twice about breaking one. The brat worries about the consequences at a later date. Most of the time the brat thinks she can talk her way out of trouble.

With the right partner she can however be controlled, when in the company of her Boy friend or Dom.The truth is most brats are very loyal, and very seldom stray, the same with a slave. Both know it is very hard to find someone who truly understands them.The true brat comes out mostly when he is not around , this is the the true brat emerges. In most cases if a female is not in her circle of friends, she looks down on other females. She has the need to be spoiled, the center of attention, and only hears what she wants to hear. Most brats are shopping addicts, and they have a fixation with shoes.

Anyway I was able to reblogg this on tumbler, which Until a few minutes ago, I did not know I even had an account, and I do not forget very much.

By BDSM Tourguide via A Submissive’s Journey

Although each submissive has their own personality, quirks, flaws and merits, each will usually fit into one of the following seven categories of submissive behavior.

Please do note that these are only the most common types of submissives; others do exist, but to much lesser degrees.

Type One: The “Little Girl” Submissive – Ever-blushing and ever-giggly, the “little girl” type of submissive is the consummate child actor. She will usually use every cute little hair twist and every sweet little smile in her arsenal to make sure everyone finds her to be the sweetest little girl in the whole community. These little girls typically ooze sweetness and often make dominants and other submissives in the community wonder what they’re really up to. Little girl types usually do not get along with other little girl types at all, as they typically crave attention and one little girl trying to muscle in on another little girl’s turf is an open threat to the incumbent little girl’s monopoly on attention-getting. For this same reason, little girl submissives do not usually do well in polyamorous relationships, preferring to be the sole object of their partner’s attention. A positive aspect of little girl types is that they are usually unwaveringly devoted to their partners and once they find a partner, they are unlikely to leave that person. From a purely psychological perspective, one has to wonder if the little girl type uses her wiles and charms and craves attention to cover up self-esteem issues.

Type Two: The “Tame Me” Submissive – The “tame me” type of submissive is overly rebellious, overly strong-willed and overly confrontational with dominant types. They want to find, in their own words, a strong dominant to break their spirit and make them be the submissives these girls just know they can be. This type of submissive doesn’t seem to realize that most dominants enjoy a spirited submissives and don’t actually want to attempt to train a wild pony only to have it turn into a old gray mare once they saddle-breaking phase is completed. A submissive that shows qualities of rebellion, will and spirit are often looked upon appreciatively by dominants, but the tame me type of submissives tend to take these traits to the next level. Ordinarily, once a tame me type is actually tamed, she becomes bored with her relationship and begins looking anew for better challenges. These submissives do not often form lasting relationships within a BDSM community. A positive thing about the tame me type of submissive is that they are really fun for the first couple of months, but after they have been tamed, they tend to settle into predictable ruts until they are ready to leave the relationship, then they will begin to act out again in hopes that someone, who is not their current partner, will attempt to tame them once again.. Psychologically speaking, one wonders is a tame me type is merely playing hard to get in order to find a partner that will put up with them and not become overly baffled when the submissive ceases to be a challenge and then leaves for another person that will do it all over again.

Type Three: The “SAM” Submissive – A “SAM” type submissive, also known as a Smart-Assed Masochist, is just that, a smart-talking submissive with a quick tongue. These submissives are usually only SAMs, or Sammie, to their partners or people they know very well. Usually, their Sammie behavior isn’t actually a cry for attention; it’s just their way of being playful. In fact, most SAMs when actually threatened with punishment will back off, saying that they were only playing and that they didn’t mean anything by it. Occasionally, this behavior can be incredibly frustrating to their partners who, by the time the SAM has agitated their partner into frenzy, are looking to string the SAM submissive up by their toes and see how many fresh red marks can be created. Interestingly enough, most SAM submissives are not actually masochists. They actually do not want to be punished for their actions as, to them; they were just playing around to begin with. The positive thing about a SAM sub is that they are usually great fun and very playful partners. Occasionally, they are playful to an infuriating level and will occasionally push their partners until their partners are ready to torture them just to relieve the stress. Psychologically speaking, a SAM is probably not actually looking for punishment or attention, but just wants to show their affection by acting the way they do. The SAM is usually subdued by a couple of harsh words, because once they realize they have stopped being fun, they do not enjoy the feeling associated with causing their partner actual distress.

Type Four: The “Brat” – The “brat” is different from the tame me type and the SAM type in the fact that they are overly-aggressive, smart-mouthed and frequently rude, they have no intentions of submitting to anyone’s authority or discipline, except that of their partner. This fact, however, does not stop the brat from continuously harassing every dominant and most submissives with which she comes into contact. Oddly enough, to their partners, brats are, almost unanimously, not bratty. The brat knows full well that their partner can and will punish them, and probably would if their partner caught them acting the way they do in a community. Brats are usually very good submissives once they find a partner, but their confidence in knowing full well that they have a partner and no one else can lay a finger on them typically causes their behavior. Anyone that’s ever fallen victim to the behavior of the brat can usually stop the brat’s behavior toward them with a well-worded email to the brat’s partner, along with any specific bratty remarks copied and pasted into the text of the mail. The good thing about brats is that they are, almost unanimously, actually very good submissive. They usually behave very well to their partners and are usually very easy to get along with in relationships. Psychologically speaking the brat probably acts the way she does, because of the sense of security afforded to her by the knowledge that she has a partner and no one else is allowed to touch her. The brat, once reported to their partners for their behavior, tend to settle down and treat the person that has reported them quite respectfully. The brat will normally only push the people she knows she can push.

Type Five: The “My Master is God” Submissive – Also known as they “I have a master and you don’t! Nyah nyah nyah nyah nyah” type of submissive. These submissives are of the opinion that their masters can do absolutely no wrong and that their master’s word is as good as law and that their masters know everything there is to know about everything. The “My Master is God” type of submissive frequently spends inordinate amounts of time talking about their masters, what their masters have done to them, or for them, or with them in the past, or any other tidbit of assumed wisdom their masters have ever passed along to them. Suffice it to say that conversations with these types of submissives can get old very fast, and most people would almost rather eat broken glass than converse at length with this type of submissive after she has related her favorite “My Master did this” story for the third or eighth or hundredth time. The good thing about the “My Master is God” submissive is that they are very, very devoted. These submissives are usually crazy about their masters and hang on his every word. Mostly, it seems, this type of submissive is usually very new and inexperienced, and frequently their masters are, too. Psychologically speaking, one wonders if these submissives are under the effects of psychoactive drugs or mind control, because most sane people are not this devoted to their partners. This type of submissive is frequently very new and very inexperienced, and therefore has nothing much of value of her own to add to a BDSM-related conversation. Her master, too, might be inexperienced, but as long as he treats her well and what he says seems to make sense, she will hang on his every word, believing that he knows more than anyone else possibly could. People in disagreements with this type of submissive will often find that, unless they have at least five documented, proven bibliographical sources to back up a claim or opinion that differs from this submissive’s master’s claim or opinion, then this submissive will never believe a word of it, choosing to believe instead that anything her master says is the absolute truth.

Type Six: The “I am Slave, Hear Me Roar!” Submissive – These are absolute, prodigious, epitome of any submissive type. Don’t call the “I am Slave” type a submissive, though, they don’t like that very much. In these slaves’ opinions, there is no other submissive group that can possibly equal their level of commitment, sacrifice, talent, experience or will to submit. To this slave archetype, submissives merely play at being slaves, and anyone not in a 24/7 TPE-type relationship cannot possibly understand what it really takes to be a slave. Somewhere along the way, the slaves falling into this category forgot that the traditional, BDSM-defined slave is supposed to be demure, servile and meant to be seen and not heard. The good thing about the “I am Slave” type is that they are often very committed, very talented, willing to sacrifice anything for their master and willing to submit to any kind of torture, torment, punishment or practice their masters desire. These slaves rarely safe word out of any situation, and frequently don’t even have safe words. Psychologically speaking, the level of ego required to drive a self-proclaimed slave to this level of verbosity and fervor seems directly contrary to the actual personality required of accepted, established slaves. It is likely that, if an Old Guard Master ever found himself in care taking or in possession of this type of slave, he would first begin her experience under him by gagging her or taping her fingers together to prevent her from vocalizing or typing exactly how great of a slave she is.

Type Seven: The “True” Submissive – The “true” submissive is often the culmination of the desires of every dominant figure around this person. The “true” submissive is often shy, under spoken, docile, servile and absolutely willing to do anything asked of her. The true submissive is usually aware first of the wants, needs and expectations of the dominant figures around her and not concerned as much with her own wants, needs and expectations. The true submissive is frequently inexperienced, untaught and looking to be pleasing by being perceived as the ‘expected’ norm that a submissive should be. The true submissive will serve anyone and allow herself to be disciplined by anyone claiming to be dominant. The true submissive will usually be found off to the side and out of the way of everyone, rather than openly interacting with people. The good thing about the “true” submissive is that they can be educated and trained out of these types of behavior. Through training and education, these submissives often find that they are allowed to say no to people. They find out that they can get involved in conversations and don’t have to be wallflowers in social situations. They also find out that they are allowed to want, need and expect things as any other person would. All they need is some encouragement. Psychologically speaking, there’s nothing at all wrong with the “true” type submissive, other than they need some guidance and that they probably got some bad advice from an online dominant or an online submissive. With good advice and guidance, these submissives can easily turn out to be fine submissives, or they can turn into one of the other six types mentioned here.

There are also, of course, the “normal” submissives that enjoy carrying on conversations, are very openly opinionated and very capable of handling themselves in social situations. It is to these kinds of submissives that others would do well to look to as role models and advice-givers.

(source) A Submissive’s Journey

What kinkycasey said lol, i read it and was like so because it says that then that’s how i must be XD Pfft!

Source: hiscleverpet

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